Friday, May 28, 2010

The One ‘Missing’ Thing

Sitting alone at home on a lovely Friday evening what can beat this feeling in terms of loneliness.
But still here I am sitting in a corner of my room thinking about what is missing from my life. And suddenly many things pops up in my mind.
My Ex Girl Friends, My Flash friends, My sold bike, My previous companies, My Ex Managers :) ( don’t know where this came from) to name a few but suddenly my conscience reminded me that I am a practical person and these ‘things’ were just a part of my life , a chapter . I should not be bothering about these.

Then I shifted my focus to an another set of things like my almost zero bank balance, My Dream bike (not that found of cars but a convertible can make it to the list :)), My 2BHK (with fully functional bar, billiards table, and voice command based lighting system), a company sponsored Europe trip but again my conscience dashed me that I not a materialistic person also, this is all too fancy stuff. I am not supposed to miss these!!!!

Then is it the joy or satisfaction or ambition or zeal or sense of success which is missing from my life again my conscience told me that these are just feelings. One cannot feel the same joy/satisfaction/ambition/zeal at all times. These are meant to vary from time to time.

Then what is that 'One' thing which I am missing which is making me miserable…Probably these few lines can answer that ….

Tabiyaat en dino begaana-e-gham hoti jaati hai,
Meri hissey ke goya har kushi kam hoti jaati hai,
Wahi hai zindagi lekin ‘jigar’ yeh haal hai apna,
Ke jaisey zindagi se zindagi kam hoti jaati hai….

Inconclusive ending, Not done, abrupt but again my conscience told me that this is just an ending of my blog I should not bother about this also!!!

PS: As usual the piece of poetry is not mine

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Keep Distance!!!

“ Rabathey haadh se baadah jaaye tu gham miltey hai,
Yahi soch..har shaks se hum kum miltey hai”

Deciphering it in simplest words means that - As we get closer with people there are chances of getting hurt thus try not to get up close and personal with people.

I know few of you might have already started sulking …What this guy wants to convey??
First he wrote a silly stuff on how valuable the second chance is totally negating the thrill/exuberance/joy of first experience , then he raises question on friendship , then he went on to explain calculated love and how to keep your self happy/satisfied with ‘Something’ when the whole world is after ‘Everything’ and now a lesson on keeping distance!!!

Come on dude…how defensive/narrow/pragmatic one can become?

Personally speaking getting hurt is not a bad thing if you know how to get out of that feeling!! Sadly most of us have no idea about it. And once hurt we keep on digging the wounds, thus making ourselves more miserable.

Let’s start with workplace where we spend a reasonable part of our day. We try to build a niche for us by gelling with people we like. We go together for coffee breaks/lunches. We do gossiping and most of the times help each other in work also. But sometimes unwanted thing happens and everything goes haywire.
Like appraisals, you get good rating and your friend/colleague just gets an average one. With no fault of yours, you can feel the discomfort/dissatisfaction affecting your relationship. You can sense the change in behavior. Your friend will start mixing with the people who got the same rating thus ignoring your company (may be to share his/her feelings towards their manager :) ) . One of my friends calls it CSR (Community of Same Raters) syndrome. It can also happen that your friend finds another person with whom he can relate more than you, same language for instance. People feel more comfortable when they get a chance to interact in their regional language thus giving no regards to your presence even though they know that it’s Greek and Latin for you. Or it could be two of you splitting apart just because both of you are falling for the only hot girl of your project/department. Although this one seems to be fair enough after all everything is fair in LOVE!!!
But what ever be the case you end up hurting your self.

Coming to broken relationships, it always hurt to see you’re EX doing well without you. Well I might sound ‘MEAN’ but tell me any other way to put it across. I am not saint.You had a great relationship with your GF/BF and now they are not in your life due to any X, Y, Z reason. You feel low when you see them doing great with some one ELSE and believe me it hurts most when you haven’t been able to pick yourself since the breakup and your partner is going places. I have seen people scrapping their social networking account, changing companies/cities to come out of it and almost end up screwing their lives and career. Love is still a matter of great emotional distress to us if it doesn’t turn out the way it is meant to be!!

Hope till now you have realized the value of keeping distance. No, I am not asking you to stop getting into relationships!! That would be the worst advice I have every given and you have ever taken. Only thing I am asking you to do is to keep a comfortable/manageable distance in your relationships without letting other person know. Be mentally prepared that things can go wrong. Have faith in your abilities. And once it happens with you just try to think from other person perspective that why it has happened to you, you would be able to cope it better. Always thinking from your perspective is not going to help you in this regard. Well easier said than done!!!
The day you will master this art, that very day you will end up being an emotional fool. Though I am still waiting for that day to come for me :).

“Jo bas chalta tu duniya chheen leti jaan meri,
Hum tu bus zinda kyunki Zeeney ka hunar rakhte hain”

PS: Both pieces of poetry are not mine

Sunday, May 16, 2010

‘The God’s Pill’

How many times someone sitting up make us realize that we are just human and it doesn’t take much to bring down this poor soul on its knees.

Yes we are mortal, perishable and above all a delicately balanced machine that most of the times just bluntly refuses to admit the fact that it is susceptible. I as an individual also fall in the same subset; I also sometimes become so mean, arrogant, self centered that other human beings ceases to exist for me. I, me, myself is the motto for most of us, nothing wrong also after all we are in a race!!!

We tend to ignore our weaknesses, our body, our surrounding when every thing is falling in place for us. Seems like a fairy tale or honeymoon period. You can’t do any thing wrong and nothing can go wrong. You feel divine, you feel great and you feel like you are the world.

But what goes around comes around. Something happens which makes you feel that you are not divine!!!!
A disease/illness, some mishap, something bad at work it can come in any form, any shape, any way and you can’t see it coming and it just rams into you …Head On..Bang!!!
And then the suffering starts, sometime it is for days, sometime it is for months and sometimes it is life long!! You can’t do anything about it. You have to go through it. You have to suffer and live with it. And then surfaces the oblivious thought WHY ME!!!

Its not only you, it happens to every one it just changes its forms. God is just trying to be creative that’s it!!! Having gone through it, still going through it and seeing other people going through this game of destiny only one question comes in my mind.
What’s the way out?
Well there is no way out!!!

Sometimes I feel that there should be something like ‘God’s Pill’ which can relive us of all the pain and suffering which we are going through. But sadly the doctor sitting up is in no mood to prescribe this pill to us!!!

I am signing off, I could be inconclusive but I hope you will understand the reason why.